Skip to main content

Nothingness

The Tools God gave me to do His Work. My Guitar. Pre-Encounter Booklet. Manila Paper for the Copy of the Songs. Songbook. The Word of God.

After a long ride from Davao to Kabacan (4pm and we were still in Matina), I went directly to one of my girls for our opencell/date/pre-enc. After two hours of sharing/talking/lesson, went home to prepare for the Sunday Service tomorrow and of course, to get some rest.

I was alone. Erika and te Juvy is still having their pre-enc party. My sis and my father is asleep. My mother is still on duty. I am alone. One woman Team preparing for the Sunday Gathering tomorrow. As I was Musing/Practicing/Soaking/Praying/Meditating (I think I should change my title into slash!!jejeje), I received a text message from Nay Langga:

"God will put you in a place of nothingness so that you'll have nothing to cling on except Hid love."

I was struck by the message.
Nothingness....I'm in a state of nothingness at that time. I was alone. And I felt nothing compared to the work God wants me to do. My Ministry, Work and even my Life seemed small to God Almighty. Maybe that's what He wants us to understand. That to accomplish things we have to rely on Him and just Cling on His Love and Live by Grace.

And as days passed by the nothingness seem to increase.
In my Work- the difficulties, the enormity and the choices I had to make.
In my Cell- Everything is not going to plan. People all of a sudden change. Commitments break and I'm speechless as to what I'm going to do.
In my finances- Everything seemed out of budget.

Again...The Nothingness...It continues...Do you know what I did?

Knelt down to God. Surrendered it all. The People, my work, my finances and even my emotions. I just kept on crying out to God. I don't know what to do. Then God, through my tears and sobs reminded me this:

"You are a disciple because you were chosen By Grace. Not by Human appointment, but by the Gift of Undeserved Grace. The Message you preach were not taught by Human preaching but it is what you received when you Encountered God. You are Chosen by Grace."

Chosen by Grace. Chosen By Grace. I had to repeat that to my self all through out the day. I had to let it sink in..That I am not here because of me its all because of Him. I'm nothing without Him. In my nothingness Lord...I'll cling to your Love..Your Grace..

Note: I had to look at the picture again. In my guitar the verse: "W/ God, all things are possible." Thank you for the reminder God...


Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Blogging again!

I miss blogging! So after nights of sipping on my coffee and thinking (and also looking at the stack of paper of all my preaching notes) I've decided to blog them. :D Since becoming a pastor 3 years ago, I would prepare for my sermons or preaching every week. It doesn't include the time I would also prepare for my G12 cell group with my core leaders and opencell life groups we conduct. I also have notes for every class I conduct on our Post-encounter, School of Leaders 1 and 2. So yes, if material is the question, no doubt I have plenty of those. Then I also though of what I am passionate about. It was always been this- reading, writing and speaking. It's also a way to keep my leaders updated of all that's happening to the church here in Kabacan; where the Spirit of God is leading us and what are some of the issues that needs to be addressed as it also resonates in the emphasis of each preaching I share. If you happen to read one of my blog posts feel free to co...
2 comments
Read more

Bring them back to Repentance? IMPOSSIBLE

This message in Hebrews 6:4 to 6, can be a warning to 3 people: Those who ‘turned away from God”; Those who have not ‘turned away from God and; Those who know people who “turned from God”.   It stands as a warning to us.  Have we heard God’s voice and trembled? I don’t mean fear that keeps us from coming to God, but the kind of fear that is spoken in Proverbs as “the foundation of wisdom.” We fondly pray that God would speak to us and hear His voice but do we really know what we are praying? It reminded me of the Israelites who were at the foot of Mount Sinai. When they heard God’s thunderous voice, they did not dare come nearer and asked Moses to speak in their behalf (Deuteronomy 5:23-27). To quote Francis Chan, “When you pick up your Bible, you are actually holding something better than a voice coming out of a cloud on the top of a mountain.” So this warning must really create a Holy fear in us that will keep us from turning away from God. It ...
Post a Comment
Read more

“Restless? Be STILL”

See the picture? That’s our University field. It’s so vast for me even I’ve seen it almost my whole life. Growing up inside the campus, growing up seeing all of these for 22 years, I still never get use to these. Masarap mag senti sa mga lugar na ito. Maaliwalas, tahimik at malawak- kasing lawak ng imagination ko. Peace. Lately, I’ve been struggling with peace. Heart. Mind. Body. Soul. Whenever I see this vastness I would dream again. That God would fill this with so many young people that will worship Him, give their lives to Him. And you know what? It excites me. And scares me. It makes me happy. And makes me nervous. Maybe it’s just really part of my personality. As Kabacan Ministry is taking off- Sunday services and open cells, my list of goals and dreams also increases. It’s not a bad thing- having goals are all important so that you would know if we really are progressing. “But we must hold on to the progress we have already made.” Phil3:16. Since all of these are happening,...
Post a Comment
Read more